« settembre 2007 | Principale | novembre 2007 »
As of tomorrow, I'll be all stitched and up and bandaged up from my oral surgery.
I'll be out of commission and off the boards for the next few days.
Just a quick FYI in case you are trying to reach me.
Happy Halloween, and have a great week everyone!
My poor little Sophie, who is a rescue doggie and sickly most of the time anyway - what with the worst allergies my vet says she has ever seen - took a scary turn for the worst. After another trip to the doctor, she was diagnosed with a nasty flare up of colitis.
She was in such pain, and whimpering and whining and soooo listless - honestly, I thought we were going to have to euthanize her! At the last minute I cancelled the workshop I was teaching today - because I knew I'd be a big blubbery mess if Sophie didn't perk up.
Sophie's been sleeping alot, but the vet gave us a lot of reason to expect a full recovery. We're feeding her (Sophie, not the vet!) chicken baby food, which really makes her happy, and her appetite is finally returning.
We've had her now for a year and a half, and I am just so so attached to her. These warm little bundles of love, doggies - they really do become such an integral part of the family!
Then, switching topics entirely and to something much less dire, but distressing none the less - I managed to nearly delete the entire database of ZNE content files and inadvertantly pulled the site down today. This was the second time in a month that I have done something that has resulted in the site being pulled offline. Even though it has only been for a matter of minutes each time - honestly - I think my heart stopped each time.
If that weren't enough, my ougoing mail server for all the ZNEart.com email addresses has gone kaput, seemingly out of the blue. My husband says it is because of the fact that I switched from DSL to Digital internet access - but I made that switch two months ago! Sheesh. The DSL people must have the same backload that I have!
Anyway, I really need to go in and figure out how to set up a new outgoing mail server, and take care of all kinds of other business - but honestly, my priority has chiefly been to sit near my little Sophie, do nothing, and just make sure she is warm, comfy, and that she knows she is loved. Somehow, this seems my most important job right now.
Here's to wishing all the best to all of you, and your families - today and always.
My dear artist friend Lennea has bestowed upon me this most wonderful award. I am not the only recipient and it was originally bestowed on her by someone else. That being said - if ever there was an award tailor made for me, this is the one!
Here is the criteria for winning:
This award shall be presented only to worthy artists who have shown evidence of being in a creative snit.
To help with the selection, we need a common frame of reference. I found this definition of snit:
snit
noun
a state of agitated irritation; "he was in a snit"
However, I think a CREATIVE SNIT requires a somewhat different defintion:
creative snit
noun
a state of creative chaos, creative frustration, or a state of obsessive creativity: "she was in a creative snit"
Therefore, worthy recipients of this prestigious award should demonstrate one or more of the following criteria:
1) photos of their chaotic creative studio spaces. [SEE HERE]
2) reports of staying up till the wee hours of the morning while consuming large amounts of coffee and or chocolate in order to finish a swap or prepare for a show. [See the post beneath this one and just about every event or show I have ever participated in. Ha!]
3) documented frustration over the creative process [See, the entire blog.]
4) evidence of a large quantity of art created over a small period of time [Ah ha! I do not qualify for this one. Wait, unless web pages, group activities and email construction counts... in which case....]
5) photos of the recipient at vendor night at any art retreat ( it goes without saying that ALL attendees at such events are either in or will soon be in a creative snit) [My life revolves around art and art supply vendors! Morning noon AND -yes- night is a Vendor Night for me!]
AND FINALLY
6) ( created especially for Jan) witnessing the recipient in a SNIT at a CREATIVE EVENT! [Though this criteria was created especially for the fabulous Jan Thomason, I refer back to criteria #2. If you've seen me at a creative event, you've seen me in a snit! My famous teaching words to my Altered Everything~Everything Altered workshop attendees: "Forget quality! Honk out some work!" If that aint a snit, I don't know what is!]
And so there you have it. I am officially qualified to receive the award. HOORAY!
THANK YOU LENNEA! I am honored! I am in a TOTAL SNIT over winning this award! Tee hee! (Oh hon, read my PS below, too!)
Now, for the hard part ~ I need to select some artists to bestow this award upon. Here goes!
**First, the incredible Gina Gabriell. Gina is creating incredible art, during a time of inconceivable grief. She brings the term ~Creative Snit~ to a new level.
Next, my wonderful lovely friend Barbe. She qualifies under every term above. She is fabulous, giving, and supportive all the while. Rock on Barbe! [Hey Barbe - be sure and read my PS below!]
Third - Kat. You rock my world. You are the number one greeter and good energy giver on the Network and you deserve a prize for that alone. I am not sure how many events you attend - but I do know that if you did, you'd be in a fabulous snit at every single one!
Fourth - Missy. Missy, Missy, Missy. You are one of the most shiz-SNIT fabulous artsy gal I know. I read those criteria and laughed out loud. If this award is not for Ms. Missy Balance, I don't know what is! (There is a PS for you below, too!)
And at that, I'll call it an award giving day. I look forward to seeing where this award goes, from here.
Here is your call to actions Gina, Barbe, Kat, and Missy:
This is what I have been working on round the clock THIS week.
The ZNE website is undergoing a site re-design. It was really born of necessity - having to do with the need to consolidate a number of different applications and housing the store and main website on the same home. The complete transition will no doubt take a few months, and I have already ruffled feathers, brought donw the entire network by accident (!) and had all kinds of other fun ~ still, I think it will be worth it in the end.
Want a sneak peak at the new design? It's already up on the website!
Check it out:
Have fun exploring!
I just want to take a moment to acknowledge the extreme stress of the conditions in San Diego County right now, here in California. Leaving home, especially under such frightening conditions - is an overwhelming proposition.
As most of you know, wild fires are burning out of control, they have already reached and consumed many homes, and hundreds of thousands of people have been displaced. The air quality and visibility is horrific, and it must be truly awful for everyone living there.
The situation is particular close to my heart as I was born in San Diego, my own son's best friend's family moved to San Diego last year and have been evacuated, and my father's house burned to the ground in the 1991 Oakland Hills firestorm.
We have numerous ZNE members in Southern California and the San Diego area, and our hearts go out to you all - as well as to the entire San Diego County community and the firefighters and rescue personell who have come from all over the country to assist. May you all be kept safe and survive this terrible situation.
A brief candle; both ends burning
An endless mile; a bus wheel turning
A friend to share the lonesome times
A handshake and a sip of wine
So say it loud and let it ring
We are all a part of everything
The future, present and the past
Fly on proud bird
You're free at last.
- Lynard Skynard
So today, my husband and I got together with my brother and his wife, and my beloved nephew Adin. We took a half hour drive to the South Bay city of San Jose to visit the Tech Museum of Innovation. The stunning show, Body Works 2, is installed there through January.
Body Works 2 features dozens of plastination models. That is, real human bodies that have been boiled in a plastic resin of sorts - that replaces all the fluids in the bodies and then hardens - thus rendering the body in near perfect and completely preserved condition.
The exhibit was one of artistic and anatomical genius, absolutely amazing, and not just a little bit disturbing. These bodies had been fully or partially skinned, posed in every position conceivable, completely naked with both male and female genitalia exposed, and in a multitude of versions of disection and trisection - including paper thin to inches and half foot wide slices. The bodies, organs and body parts were strung up, torn apart, and separated in ways that were beyond anything I ever could have imagined.
It was my husband and sister-in-law and their combined scientific and morbid curiosity that led myself and equally skeptical brother to the museum today. IE, not my choice of how to spend the day. Still, I did ok moving through the first quarter of exhibits - until I got to what I will refer to as the infant room. In this particular room, there were embryos, fetuses, and infants who'd been just born. Born alive or not - I do not know - as needless to say, they were all dead now and had been plasticized. The exhibits each included extensive anatomical detail, but personal details about the bones, organs, and entire bodies - were left to the imagination. And in the infant room, my imagination got the better of me. These were real bodies after all.
There was one adult exhibited in the infant room. Here she is, in all her post death skinned glory. It is hard to see in this picture, but at the exhibit, as you leaned in to look at this woman, there in her disected belly, there were two tiny feet, the bottoms of which stuck through her uterus which had also been sliced open.
I couldn't help but wonder - and it made me cry - (which embarrassed me, and embarrassed my husband even more) - but who was this woman? How far along was she? How did she die? Was she someone's wife, someone's daughter? Perhaps, a mother already? I mostly rushed through the rest of the exhibition, and was the first in my family group to leave. In the lobby I found one of those hard plastic chairs they always have in museums, and I sat and waited for everyone else to be done. No part of me wanting to go back in.
I am left with questions about how our culture - and more obviously - ME, how I - perceive death. It's so uncomfortable. Its heartbreaking. There is no safe or soft place to land in my thoughts around death. On a personal level, I do most definitely believe in an aferlife, a heaven, a nirvanna. Perhaps of necessity - I believe in ultimate forgiveness. I believe that our Father, our Mother, the light, the vibration, call it what you will, will meet us - every single one - with arms wide open, to celebrate, share and expand upon every single thing we have learned here on earth about LOVE - the only thing that matters. Love. I believe.
So, what I believe gets me through a lot. A lot of days, a lot of nights. A lot of grief. And a lot of joy.
But still, I was hard pressed to get through that entire exhibit. And that's some serious food for thought.
Here's to hoping that any introspection you take on this weekend, brings you to a good place, and that all your food for thought goes down well.
xo - Chel
There's music in the sighing of a reed;
There's music in the gushing of a rill;
There's music in all things, if men had ears:
Their earth is but an echo of the spheres.
~Lord Byron
My nephew, and my husband.
Makes my heart so happy!
Have a great Friday everyone!
xo - Chel
Here's Where I'll be on Saturday 10/13:
ZNE will have a table full of goodies for sale, along with fellow ZNE members Missy Balance and Lauren DeSalvo.
++Dozens of other indie art vendors.
If you are in the Sacramento area tomorrow - particularly in the afternoon - stop by and see us!
And, if you are in the San Francisco Bay Area, lots of ZNE/PCM members will be strutting their stuff at The Livermore Art Walk!
The Sixth Annual ArtWalk will transform Livermore into a fine arts district, bringing over 150 artists and their works into downtown businesses. ZNE Members who will be selling at this event will include:
Joanna Crawshaw Miller
Sally Haig
Jeanine Komush
Catherine Houf
Tamar Meir
and Kim Pace
And also here, dozens of other artisans as well.
Hope everyone has a wonderful Saturday!
xo - Chel
This pretty picture was taken, yesterday.
These are my teeth. My right side molars to be precise. Look closely at the one on the bottom in the middle. The one with the (yes, already) root canal filling showing like white roots. Now, look at its left side.
See how it has that dark colored gap thing. That is actually a big chip. A really big chip. More like, a chunk. And in fact, that bottom part under the chip, the part that almost looks like a teeny hook? That's under my gum line. Poking me. As we speak.
It feels yucky. Really yucky.
But, not as yucky as this.
THIS is the description of the procedure I will be needing, in order to mend said "chip."
CROWN LENGTHENING:
"The periodontist will make incisions to remove the soft tissue and to provide access to the tooth roots and the underlying bone. Bone removal allows more of the tooth structure to be exposed. The bone is removed using a combination of hand instruments (like small chisels) and rotary instruments (similar to the drill used to treat cavities). "
I'm not sure if you read that all the way through. I in fact passed out several times and then had to come back, and start again. I then went partially blind. In case you are having the same problems I am, here it is again:
"The periodontist will make incisions to remove the soft tissue and to provide access to the tooth roots and the underlying bone. Bone removal allows more of the tooth structure to be exposed. The bone is removed using a combination of hand instruments (like small chisels) and rotary instruments (similar to the drill used to treat cavities)."
I don't think I really need to say much more. I'll leave my comments on this matter, at this:
Sigh. And how is YOUR day going?
WOW. The HSAS auction was a wonderful experience - so many artists donated so much incredible art, and the blog received thousands of hits over the last week. We received hundreds of bids, and in the end we raised just under $3,000. That's the amount we needed to pay for the first major expense of this project, the mosaic itself. So, with the money we raised prior to the auction - we've acheived that first goal. P H E W.
Now, I've some administrative stuff to deal with. (Invoices, shipping addresses, etc.) and then we'll start planning for our next major financial goal. We need to raise another $5,000 to donate to the Zoo itself, in conjunction with the memorial installation. My plan is to continue some minor fundraising through the websites and ZNE - and also to look into the possibility of a local fundraising event. But my primary effort will be to solicit the local business community. Since these donations will go directly to the Zoo, they will be tax deductible and so I am hoping to be able to get a few businesses to come together and support this effort.
In any case, I am SO pleased that we are all set with the mosaic itself. I am always so overwhelmed and humbled by the artistic community's commitment to supporting one another during difficult times, and this project has been no exception. My heart is breaking over Iva and Gina's losses - and I am sure it always will - but it is also full of pride, to be associated with such an incredible and caring community.
Please see the Hope Sees a Star website for more details and information about the auction - www.HopeSeesaStar.com.
All that being said - this past week has been a bit nuts - with lots of long hours manually updating bids, tallying things, double checking high bids, etc. Last week on Friday, my honey bunny left for a week in England to visit with his grandmother. The kids have been at their 'other' parents' houses - and so, with the exception of the doggies and the cat - I have been here alone.
On Sunday, Butter managed to rip part of one of toenails off. For about three minutes, blood was spurting everywhere. I about passed out. But then it stopped. I was able to wash it off and put some antibiotic on it, and he's been bouncing around like his old self, ever since.
That crisis averted, yesterday - as I was chewing on a jelly belly (love them!) - I suddenly bit down on something crunchy, and just plain - wrong. I spit the jelly belly chewed up pulp into my hand, and lo and behold - a part of one of my teeth (!) fell into my hand. Lovely. On so many levels. Sheesh.
I looked up the meaning of dreams about teeth falling out, since it was ~actually~ happening to me, and I figured maybe the universe was trying to tell me something. Most interpretations suggested that I am experiencing every level of anxiety that there can be. In truth, I have been feeling much much better on that level, for a couple months now.
Then, I found this tidbit:
"It has also been said that if you dream of your teeth falling out, then it symbolizes money. This is based on the old tooth fairy story. If you lose a tooth and leave it under the pillow, a tooth fairy would bring you money."
Unfortunately, I fogot to leave my tooth bit under the pillow. I'll have to do that tonight. I wonder if I'll get a little extra if I leave her some yummy jelly belly goo - too? Ha!
Well, time to call the dentist. Oh, how I love the dentist. Almost as much as I love the doctor.
And so, the beat goes on. May your lives be full of only good dreams coming true, and may you find wonderful wishes under your pillow, whenever you check - too!
xo - Chel
A Blue Wind Blew In Coloring the World it Landed On
with sapphire dust and moonbeam charm.
It hung in the air with sparkle and shine and waited...
And all the dreamers and fairies and angels came out to play.
All of them joyful, all of them grinning, even the queen was elated.
"Play on!" trumpeted the Queen's Jester. "Yes, do" said her handmaid. "Whoosh, whooosh," said the wind.
So the dreamers, and the fairies and the angels all danced - on gossamer wings, perhaps to chance - a glimpse of blue never seen before.....
And the queen had diamonds in her crown, sparkling so clear and beautiful
And in that blue wind, a periwinkle breeze, carried with it such tender grief, so poignant and rueful.
Days and weeks and years went by.
Those angels and fairies and gossamer wings fluttering in the sky -
Night falls and the Queen's heart can not contain the joy of the coming dawn -
A place where
A Blue Wind
Blew In
Coloring the World it Landed On.
This poem was written by: Chelise Stroud Hery, Treva Fox-Christy, Gina Smith, and Heidi Eberle
Artwork taken from Gina Smith's ZNE Network Photo Album
Music selection for this poem - Never Saw Blut Like That by Shaw Colvin - suggested by Heidi Eberle
I am mired in thoughts of mothers and daughters. Mothers without daughters. Daughters without mothers. I am mired in thoughts of spirits whispering in the wind and angels sitting in trees. I am mired in thoughts of everything possible, and longing, and grief too.
Mothers, and daughters. And daughters and mothers. Angels, and spirits. Oh if only, if only I could hold it, I could save it, I could soothe it, I could heal it, all that grief. If only.
Sometimes, when she is heavy on my heart and mind (always) - but I mean, more so than usual, not pushed back to that place where I can bear it and get through the day - sometimes, I talk to her. Today, I wrote her a letter.
Dear Mama,
I never thought to write you in those last few years – everything about you was mired in so much sadness, and I thought I could stay far away from all that grief, if I stayed away from you. I did not know.
I never thought to tell you that your spirit visits my dreams every night, it always has. Did you know that your wishes follow me around like secret butterflies, landing on my shoulder, silently sitting on my fingertips? Did you ever wonder if dreams come true? They do. I never told you Mama, but they do.
I can hear your voice, I remember your words, I remember your smell, that silky feel of your nighty, when I was little, snuggled in your lap. I remember. How safe I was then, I had no idea, I did not know. Oh if I had, I’d have held so tight. I’d have never let go. I was braver then. All that fierce love, a child’s heart and a little girl hands. Stronger in some ways, than I will ever be again.
I never told you.
In my dream, I saw you on a hill top, so great and lush – heaven before us, our lives behind us. You were not angry, you were not sad, all that grief and pain and craziness that took you away, so far away – it was gone. Just you, my mother, my beautiful mother, your lovely face and your strong creative hands. In my dream, you called to me, and reached out, you held me again – like when I was little. You knew, you knew, you knew how hard it was for me, you knew how much I missed you. You knew how desperately I wanted to be forgiven –
I am sorry I did not save you.
I am sorry my love was not enough.
I am sorry I abandoned you.
I am sorry I let go.
I am sorry.
I never told you.
In my dream, Mama, you knew.
(Isn't my mother beautiful? Look at silly little me, chewing on her hand.)
Ultimi commenti